Got a Referral to A Major Medical

The text below is what I brought into my PCP of 26 years. I'm afraid we are too late to actually make it there on time given the pain I am experiencing today, but I am going to try and hold out.

As you know, I’ve always contended that I gave myself a condition in 1995. Initially, I couldn’t articulate it, but living through it has given me time and perspective to understand it much better. My life has followed the article exactly.

This condition is marked by brief transitions over decades that culminate in a final transition that lasts up to a year. I’ve lived all those transitions first hand. All my previous periods when I was ill were just a few months. I would quickly be able to return to my routine of working out, etc.

After I was ill in 2012, I resolved to change my life, knowing that it would not last a normal lifetime. Even then, I could block out the fact I was ill and lead a normal life while making decisions on that level. This was the main component behind me getting divorced. I wanted a chance to die having had a happy period, and my marriage was not good.

After I was sick again in 2018, I got into the best shape of my life within 6 months. In January of 2022, the final transition began. I lost 35 or so pounds in two months. Since then, my weight has remained constant even through period of nausea, severe abdominal pain, and everything else. I won’t go through all I have suffered through this year, I think the last two weeks are sufficient to summarize my current state.

No one believes me, I get that. It is unbelievable. But, It is true, as an old experimental iatrogenic condition, this science has been excluded from the digital world and I have worked with researchers medical library researchers to find it in print, but to no avail. Either I am psychotic, or it is true. Those are the two choices. My mother has seen me through the brief transitions and Kelly has seen me endure this long final one.

This final phase involves severe volume depletion with loss of circulation to the everything and energy (ATP) being supplied by the candidiasis. The symptoms are circadian, always peaking mid-afternoon and lessening by evening. I treat the severe skin burning with antifungal ointment, Miconazole. It helps. It doesn’t fix it, but it lessens it.

I have also had severe constipation that started midyear. At first, Psyllium husk was enough to help. Just one capsule a day. Eventually, this didn’t work - after having to disimpact myself a few times, I incorporated about 20-25mg of Fluconazole into the Psyllium husk capsule. While my bowel movements would be odd, often finger thin and several times a day instead of my normal one, this also helped get me by.

Two weeks ago, the burning had been spreading to my under my arms, my shoulders, and mid-back from just my arms feeling more like muscle pain - sensitive to movement. I made an appt for one week ago (10/28). The day before, I moved it out a week, because I felt like I could go one more week, and I honestly believe from everything I read that being in an emergency room will at best result in a treatment that kills me. Then, Sunday, 10/30, I had the worst day I’ve had all year. It was as if every pain receptor was screaming PAIN but the only sensitive areas were my mid back and under my arms. My pain threshold is so high I no longer bother getting injections for my neuroma. I welcome that predictable pain. I cry from the other pain and depression of knowing the progression. So this was bad.

The next day, I was back to just the normal skin burning and some muscle pain, with the pain under my arms lessening. This continued until Friday, 11/4, when I once again had a horrible day of non-specific pain. The fabric of my shirt felt like needles and I felt pain everywhere. A hot shower helped some and as usual, by evening, the pain had mostly left. Saturday 11/5 the pain was gone, and I was cold and clammy all day – wearing shearling insulated sweats with thermals underneath my legs were still cold to the touch. Despite drinking 40+ ounces, I peed only about 12 ounces. Then, that night, at about 4 am, I woke with sharp pains directly beneath the center of my ribcage. Later, in the morning, the cold clamminess went away. The afternoon saw the burning switch to my pectorals. This progression is all the loss of circulation moving through the body. I know it sounds fantastic, but the whole reason I stayed with YOU thru the years over switching PCP’s was because you’ve heard me since the beginning trying to explain what would happen. It is happening. It is going to get so much worse, the men in the article were all empty husks of pain.

I’m done with two to three-month referrals (and also have only seen a GI in the Spring, an Allergy doc in the summer, a spinal doc in August, and a Neuro in October. My dermatologist appt for July was “lost” and the next available was mid-October and I just said No.

Current symptoms: Burning Skin, nausea, pressure sensitive in areas, burning in muscles of back under shoulders. It changes basically daily.

I honestly don’t expect you to believe me. I need your help - I would like sent to somewhere diagnostic, the best you can do. I’m prepared to risk anything. I’ve stayed away from the ER for the entire year because I fear from the article that the first line treatments would be fatal.

My affairs are in order. It is more than I can take at this point.